I went and had a tour of a daycare today and it has left me with mixed feelings. On one hand I loved everything they had for kids to do there, the care was amazing and I thought it would be really good for Mateo to have that interaction with kids. Although while I was looking at these ladies rocking some kids to sleep or sooth some crying kids, it leaves me sad to think some other person would do that for my child that isn't me. I am scared of the bond that person would have with my child. My mother tries to tell me to think about it this way, that my bond can not be recreated in anyway because you created that child and care for that child like no one else will, so I guess I have to keep telling myself that.
On another note I have been researching more publishers, and went to the library to pick up more books for information so I am still working hard on my endeavours.
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I promise, daycare really is ok! You and I have different perspectives, as I was excited to get back to work, and I have the luxury of a sister-in-law who provides home daycare, but it will be all right. I was very worried about how my girls would bond with their aunt, and that perhaps even love her more, but even at family functions where we are both present, I am the one they want when they scrape a knee or have a fight. (Although sometimes they ask for her help in the washroom. That, I'm ok with!) It is not possible for anyone to recreate the bond that you have had with Mateo from birth.
ReplyDeleteIf you need to work outside of the home, of course it goes without saying that you may miss some moments, and ther will be tears shed (his and yours!) but don't forget that all day long you are working for him as well.
There are certainly advantages to having kids in social environments, especially if you pick a capable provider, as I'm sure you will.
By the way, good luck with the writing! I love Writer's Market as a resource as well. (I just started freelance writing a year and a half ago when home on my second mat leave.)
I was lucky to be able to stay home for the first 3 years (but man, were we broke!). However, having only one child and not a lot of friends or family with young kids, we didn't socialize with many kids her age. In fact, a lot of times it was mostly adults. So when she started daycare it was a bit hard on her, never having been away from us for long and never having played with her peers. It took quite a while for her social skills to develop.
ReplyDeleteI agree it is hard to let someone else "raise" your kid while you are at work, but the important thing is that they are loved and cared for. If your husband watched the baby while you worked you would still miss out on those experiences. So as long as you enjoy the experiences you DO have and baby is in a safe and happy environment, he will be well-adjusted. I've come to realize it DOES take a village.
Think of it this way, this will teach your son how to trust and confide in other people and thats a good thing! no one can replace you and he'll know that you're his mother no matter what. Daycare can be a great thing!
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